Myths about STRESS

Myth Number 1: Stress is something that happens to us

We look for a cause, same “thing” that causes stress – a germ, poor working conditions, difficult economic times. If we could only identify it, we could reduce our stress. We focus our attention outward in a futile attempt to come to grips with whatever is giving us stress. When we blame outside world for our stress, we become victims. We cannot point to another person, a situation, a “thing” in our environment and say, “that is stress.” Our work, the time pressure we face, or even our spouse, they are not stress. They may act as stimuli to our stress, but our stress exist in one place in the world…inside ourselves.
We are the source of our own stress. Stress never happens to us; stress is our reaction to the things that happen to us. We can’t control the world around us…though we try to. No matter how hard we try, we cannot protect ourselves from change.
The good news is; we are the source of our own stress. If we have the power to create stress and unhappiness, we also have the power not to create stress and happiness. The solution to the problem is self-knowledge and skill, becoming aware of our inner strength and knowing how to use it.

Myth Number 2: There is good stress and bad stress

Stress experts talk about good stress and bad stress, yet not one of them can define the difference between good stress and bad stress except in terms of consequences. Let’s say you go jogging. You exercise your body, increasing your heart rate and making your muscles work. You come home feeling refreshed and alive. Then someone says to you, “ See you have good stress.” The next day you go jogging and suffer from heart attack. While you are lying in the grass, that same person comes to you and says, “ Now you suffer from bad stress.” So you end up with a game of stress roulette. If you win, and have good stress, you get to play the game again. If you lose, and suffer bad stress, you end up in coronary care unit. Not a very useful way of understanding stress. So whether you have good or bad stress would never be clear until you suffer with the consequences… and I don’t think we would like to take that chance.

Myth Number 3: We need stress to achieve optimum performance

This myth is seen quite prevalent among supervisors, managers, and people who feel they must control someone else’s behavior. Far too many bosses use fear as a management tool. If you motivate people with fear they increase their activities. But what happens tomorrow? Fear causes an immediate increase in productivity quickly followed by an even greater decrease. Fearful employees soon become hostile, angry, resentful, all of which damage morale and interfere with productivity. The rapid increase in productivity is short lived, but hostility, fear, and resentment continues for long period of time, reducing overall productivity. No one wins through intimidation.
Still others think that if they put themselves under pressure, they will do better. They confuse being stressed with being challenged. The arousal or excitement we feel when challenged does not lead to stress. We need challenge in life to excel, to reach heights of performance that we would not normally reach. This is very healthy for us. When we does don’t have challenge, life becomes rather dull and meaningless. In fact, lack of challenge is a significant source of stress for those who feel regimented in their work.
On the other hand, when we are fearful, which is emotionally and physically different from feeling challenged, the arousal we experience is stressful. Our bodies tense, and our minds become clouded. We don’t feel well or think clearly, and life becomes more and miserable. The more fearful we are, the more unbalanced and we become, and the more stress we experience.

Myth Number 4: I don’t have stress

Many of us deny stress because:
1. Real men don’t have stress.
2. I am superwoman, I can (have to) do it all.
3. Only weak people can’t cope with pressure.
4. We are unconscious of the reality of our lives.
There are few people in our society who are really free from stress. It doesn’t matter how many degrees you have, or how much money you have, stress is in all probability a significant part of your life. The most dangerous part of stress is that often you don’t even know you have it. You become accustomed to a certain level of chronic stress, and it begins to feel normal, part of everyday life. You even believe that some stress is good for you. In reality, this unconscious and constant level of unrelieved “normal” stress often leads to disease.